@TravLeBlanc: If you love someone, set them free. If they come back with two police officers, you'll know that setting them free was a bad idea.
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@KeetPotato: [lightbulb store] owner: "what watt can i get you?" me: owner: me: owner: "did i stutter?" me: "i dont know"
@TheToddWilliams: MOM: What did you learn at summer camp? KID: We built a generator out of sticks and mud MOM: A generator? For what? KID: To charge our iPods