@MrPudmansButler: If you never used that plastic thing that keeps pizza from sticking to the box lid as GI Joe's poker table you're too mature for me.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jctwritesstuff: Me: *tied up* Guy: *hits my kneecap* M: I'm not a rat! G: Bring in her sworn enemy! G2: *tosses Rubik's Cube at me* M: Oh god no! I'll talk!
@SonOfCha: Sometimes I'm depressed and then a girl stars one of my tweets and it's like YAAAAYYYY NEW GIRLFRIEND!!!!!
@Wine_Honey1: When placing an order online for a baby shower cake, make sure you're not half asleep. COPULATIONS! IT'S A BOY just confuses everyone.