@jnrbtsn: If you open a door for me, I will lick you. Sometimes it's awkward.
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@DirtyySouthMess: Apparently it's not enough to just show up, you need to be wearing pants as well.
@jessokfine: My husband got some virtual reality goggles for christmas and so far I like them because they make him very vulnerable to attack.
@sucittaM: Watching my mother-in-law order at Starbucks is like watching a drunk gorilla try to start a car with a french fry.
@noog: If your kid's shitty kindergarten drawing is hanging on your fridge, you are an enabler of mediocrity.