@causticbob: If you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. That's nothing, because if you play it forwards, it installs Windows
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@AbbyHasIssues: If I won the lottery, I wouldn't go nuts. Probably buy some printer ink, and with what was left over, maybe an avocado.
@ficklenuts: [first day of school] LILY: My mommy named me Lily because she loves lilies. LUNA: My mommy named me Luna because she loves the moon. BRANDY and METHANY: We hate this game.
@truegritrumble: ME: *as a surgeon* What's the worst that could happen? Your nose buzzes & we put all the pieces back & start over...Where are you going?
@ThisOneSayz: The Force can make you lift a spaceship out of the swamp, but proper sentence structure teaching, it can not.