@causticbob: If you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. That's nothing, because if you play it forwards, it installs Windows
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@EndhooS: "Asphyxiate' would be worth like a million points..." I thought to myself as I lay choking on a Scrabble tile.
@SamGrittner: Life is like a roller coaster: There are ups & downs, you often feel like vomiting, but in the end there are weird pictures of you for sale.
@Tmoney68: "DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE? YOU'RE IN THE JUNGLE GYM, BABY! AGES THREE TO NIIIIINNNNE!" - Axl Rose, playground monitor.
@dafloydsta: [first date] HER: I just love a man who's not afraid to be honest. ME: *trying to impress* You sound really stupid right now.