@PaulyPeligroso: If you put on BBC news and told me it was Downton Abbey, I'd watch for like 20 min before I asked "For real, tho?"
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@WheelTod: A zendetta is when you launch a blood feud against a killer who murdered your entire family, but remain pretty chill about the whole thing.
@internetluke: Jesus: saw that facebook event "last supper"... looks good but whys it called the "last supper" ? Judas: oh.. No reason really
@UncleDuke1969: [doorbell] "Sir, do you believe Jesus died for your sins?" "No." "Why not?" "He died like 2000 years ago." "So?" "I'm 46. Do the math."
@lakeanagirl: I like to take an empty Krispy Kreme donut box to work and sit in the break room and watch all of the disappointed faces