@TravLeBlanc: If you say "no ifs, ands, or buts", then get ready for a shitload of "shoulds", "as well as", and "howevers".
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@ibid78: WAITER: can i take your order? HER: *looks at lobster tank* i'll take that one ME: *looks out window* i'll take that pigeon
@rcromwell4: "Then, the handsome prince sees her dead body laying there and has to kiss her." "Ummm, what?" "Trust me, the kids will love it."