@KKAlThani: If you set someone free, love them. Wait I mean, if you love someone for free, set them. That doesn't make sense. Forget it.
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@hippieswordfish: 'sir, no food allowed in the dressing rooms.' what, am i supposed to just guess the pop tart capacity of these cargo shorts before I buy?
@TheWadest: Chicks love guys with tattoos cuz it means they're willing to commit to something stupid for the rest of their lives...
@iinkedZombie: My son asked me what it's like to be a parent so I woke him up at 3 a.m. to let him know that I couldn't sleep.
@OtherDanOBrien: [a 2nd grade classroom 5 yrs from now] TEACHER: Khaleesi M, please leave Khaleesi S alone. Khaleesi T, I still need your permission slip