@duplicitron: If you smoke while you're pregnant your baby comes out wearing a t-shirt and jeans looking cool as hell.
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@JoshuaHvr: If you factor in "supply and demand"... she DOES NOT want the D. There is so much D trying to go around, not even the alphabet wants the D.
@T_Bonezzz_: I like to put a few lawnmowers in the back of my truck and follow landscapers all day just to make them nervous
@beefman138: I will never refer to 'drunk me' or 'sober me' because that implies the second one exists.
@ThaJawn: (Animal school) Lion: That's my desk Wildebeast: Sorry, I'm gnu -5 minutes later Sloth: *slowly falling from chair* Ha. Ha. Ha. Gnu!