@iwearaonesie: If you start smacking people with your wife's purse she won't ask you to hold it for her anymore
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@panmidwest: ME: I made you some coffee! It's even double filtered… fancy right? WIFE: ME: WIFE: couldn't separate the coffee filters could you? ME: no
@WritePlay: *date* GIRL: I love hot tubs. Do you love hot tubs? LOBSTER: That's like the third time you've asked me that.
@okimstillhungry: “Do you want to hold my baby?” Yeah nice try. You got yourself into this mess you hold your own damn baby.