@gwatts77: If you steal my identity and get a credit card I'll be impressed. Not because you stole my identity, but because you got approved. Kudos!
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@BuckyIsotope: Vladimir Putin seems like the kind of guy who would fake a sneeze and flip the board over when he's losing at Risk.
@gojarbe: *puts ranch dressing on chicken* aww look at his little cowboy hat and boots, how cute is that
@wesleybordelon: Hey guys, what's the name of that movie where Michael Cera plays a socially awkward teenager?