@gwatts77: If you steal my identity and get a credit card I'll be impressed. Not because you stole my identity, but because you got approved. Kudos!
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@Quartzjixler: Dancing Prime Minister Dancing Chancellor of the Exchequer Dancing Lord Privy Seal -ABBA explores dance vis-a-vis constitutional monarchies
@Not_a_JesusGirl: I hate it when I'm at someone's house and they ask stupid questions like "Who are you?" and "Is that a gun?"
@ryan9billion: I liked watching squirrel soap operas unfold in my backyard right up until the damn neighbor cat murdered all the actors.
@WilliamAder: A woman at work told me I look younger with my glasses off. I told her she looked younger with my glasses off, too.