@mishakey: If you stop at a yellow light I'm going to assume you have something illegal in your car.
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@bingowings14: My hangover has been going on for so long that I'm beginning to wonder if Peter Jackson directed it.
@OhHiAlyPie: "I just really need a good man to fill the hole" *100 men come running up "In my heart." *100 men run away
@vikkaroni: "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I? I took a nap until I finally heard a car coming."
@mexinonblonde: *handsome, young man walks up* HYM-Ms. Me-Hold it Jr. Yes, I'm sexy. But young guys aren't my thing. HYM-You've toilet paper on your heel.