@_green723: If you successfully toss a quarter 5 times through the moving blades of a ceiling fan, you are talented and stoned.
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@SuperTeeWhy: Jaws (2015): "(cell phone) Hi Coast Guard, yeah a shark is banging my boat oh you're on your way great thanks"
@pumpkin_horse: *cries over spilt milk* *cries under spilt milk* *cries adjacent to spilt milk* *cries immediately to the left of spilt milk* *cries diagona
@bornmiserable: "This race is over," said Donald Trump, referring to the entire human race if he is elected president.
@thagr8short1: I never try to make guests feel at home. If they wanted to feel at home, they should have stayed there.