@radtoria: if you tell your guests your house was just broken into and fake cry they will clean it for free
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@JJSummertime: If I litter my sidewalk and steps with those little pumpkins, does it keep people out or make them trip or what?
@Home_Halfway: The most annoying part about getting older is the incessant desire to give those younger than me unwanted advice.
@Midlifecrisis18: My son didn't call while I was on the road today so I'll just be here in my hotel room playing 'Cat's in the Cradle' on repeat.