@KrunkedRobot: If you think the USA can shoot down nuclear missiles fired by North Korea just remember we couldn't even have lights at the Super Bowl.
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@ahamedweinberg: Tombstones should just say how old the person was. I don't wanna walk around doing grave math.
@ShutUpThatsWho: [pirate ship capturing another ship] Pirate: Prepare to be bored! Other Captain: Don't you mean boarded? *pirate opens stamp collection*
@AsgardianRose: Every kiss begins with 'K' I whisper quietly to myself as I read his one letter response to my last 7 text messages.