@LoveNLunchmeat: If you tweet about orthopedic shoes enough, you don't even need to write "No DMs" in your bio.
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@Dawn_M_: *rolls over to your desk on chair* So what was in that browser you just quickly minimised?
@just1fool: I just want to make you hot. Mess your hair up. Get your blood flowing. When I chase you around the house over the last piece of pizza.
@aka_fatman: Sure, your carpenter could turn water into wine, Father. Now let ME tell you about a plumber who can increase his size by eating mushrooms.
@iRowlf: "Yo, somebody filled this calzone with a checkbook and sunglasses!" -Vin Diesel eating a purse