@pippydrydocking: If you want to give me dirty looks for being at the liquor store at 9am, don't be open.
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@bourgeoisalien: Holiday tip: remember, you only have a few days left to drop out of people's lives to avoid buying gifts. You're welcome.
@SamDelanche: My boss just asked if I'm illiterate, which is offensive because I know exactly who my father is.