@trevso_electric: If you want to keep a secret from me, write it down and send it to me as a Facebook event invitation.
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@lovemyboots111: "One day I caught myself smiling for no reason, then I realized I was thinking of you...." under a moving bus
@AverageClo: Why do people say "To be frank..." when they're about to be brutally honest? WHAT IF FRANK LIED!? WHAT IF I WANT TO BE MARLENE!?
@wolfpupy: at the grampys, about to anounce who won the grampy award. open envelope. its grandpa!!! you did it congratulations