@iwearaonesie: if you want your wife to take you seriously, don't throw your sippy cup during an argument
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@itsa_talia: my cat sounds so cute when he sneezes but i really wish he'd stop wasting the coke. it's like goddamn amateur hour with him.
@sgtblueeyes: I told her it's been a while. She told me that was fine. It's just like riding a bike. Now she's mad I checked her for proper inflation
@EJGomez: "911? Yes I need to report an incident" "What is it mam?" "THIS. GIRL. IS. ON. FIRE!" "Getting real tired of this crap, Alicia."