@papasuncle: If you watch 2016 backwards, it's a heartwarming story of how celebrities can come back to life just by trending on the Internet.
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@SortaBad: *practices like 1000 times in the mirror* [at Starbucks] "One grander none-fatty flaparinno" barista: ... "I'll try again tomorrow"
@Breadery: Play The Bee Gees loudly several times a day from your home so that if you have to kill someone the sounds won't be unusual.
@ventivodkacran: You'd think these people on Grey's Anatomy would've already figured out that a major disaster is going to happen every year around May.
@Try2StopME: *Knock Knock* Me: Who is it? Police: Police. Me:What do u want? Police: To talk. Me: How many r u? Police: 2 Me: Talk to each other.