@papasuncle: If you watch 2016 backwards, it's a heartwarming story of how celebrities can come back to life just by trending on the Internet.
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@slotjunkierose: Spent 10 mins trying to get into my car today...finally the door opened when the person who actually owned the car unlocked it.
@beisswrandon: The best way to get your kid to play with 800 toys at once is to tell then you're going to donate them to charity.
@daemonic3: I don't understand the trend of Chinese restaurants with "NO MSG!" signs. Why would I eat somewhere that I can't send texts?
@dlockw21: Currently on minute 137 of Easy~Bake Oven cupcakes. I'll be live Tweeting their status as they crisp up over the next day or two.