@SortaBad: If you watch Sleeping Beauty backwards it's about a prince who was so charming he kissed his girlfriend and she fainted for 17 years
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@_PerziaN_: Parents that tell u "it's just a little noise" when their kid cries on a train are the same ones who knock on ur door when the music is loud
@Sickayduh: ME: *angrily dragging wife thru the mall* Maybe THIS jewelry store will have one. HER: I don't think you get what a tornado watch is.
@zachraffio: They say real men hunt their food, which is why I throw a spear through the box of pasta before letting it bleed out in my shopping cart.