@sixthformpoet: If you watch Twitter backwards, it's about millions of socially-awkward people gradually learning how to survive in the real world.
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@collinwithtwoLs: *cashier stares at obviously fake ID* you sure you're 3? *dog panics and runs out of the store barking*
@flashember: [Enters baby room late at night] *flicks switch* [baby's got a raccoon in a headlock] "What the-" DAD CLOSE THE DOOR THIS PUNK OWES ME MONEY