@sixthformpoet: If you watch Twitter backwards, it's about millions of socially-awkward people gradually learning how to survive in the real world.
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@Donna_McCoy: [first date] Him: *dips chip into salsa rather than scooping* Me: *gets up and leaves* (...comes back, grabs salsa bowl, leaves for real)
@vault101girl: This guy at work always looks down my blouse. So im going to put a piece of popcorn in there to see if he points it out.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Carson: No it wasn't a friend it was a close family member. And I didn't stab her I froze her heart. "Sir, that's the plot of Frozen."
@IamEnidColeslaw: watch only the first and last episodes of How I Met Your Mother. you're welcome