@PLATINUM2000: If you were a tree you'd be a bonsai, and if you were mine you'd be dead by now.
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@FredPollack: Flirting is a way of life, the moment you stop is when you're dead ... then your spouse cleans the gun and places it in your hand.
@OurMarketingGuy: Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
@mexinonblonde: *handsome, young man walks up* HYM-Ms. Me-Hold it Jr. Yes, I'm sexy. But young guys aren't my thing. HYM-You've toilet paper on your heel.