@Vodkantots: If your boyfriend doesn't buy you chocolates today, it's probably because he thinks you're fat.
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@drunkNnaughty: If you have to ask if it's too early to drink...you're an amateur & we can't be friends
@bigmacher: Candy canes are the perfect treat. They are minty & put you into the holiday spirit & can easily be fashioned into a shank.
@hazelmotes1: Superman: I'm my own worst enemy. Lex Luthor: oh. That's nice. I'm literally standing right here.