@Supafunkadunka: If your cat brings home a dead bird and presents it to you, don't be rude. Take a little bite.
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@wendyraepearce: I just caught my husband smiling in his sleep. He's going to pay for that later.
@electrolemon: scarlet joe hanson sounds like an old timey boxer's name. "weighin' in at 182 lbs, 5'9", the ol' black widow, scarlet jooooooe hansen!"
@djdarrellripley: Her: I like dangerous sex, like in a moving car! Me: Have you ever had an accident? Her: No, I'm on the pill. Me: (Sigh)