@JennyJohnsonHi5: If your conservative parents piss you off over the holidays, come out to them. You don't even have to be gay, it's just a fun thing to do.
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@shariv67: Boy, your name must be Adobe cuz when you call me up for a date, I say "Ask me again later."
@KeetPotato: [scrabble] god: 43 points angel: squid? wtf is squid? god: it's an animal angel: you can't just make up animals god: [jim-faces into camera]
@Michael1979: At Christmas, it's important to pause and remember all those who have wronged you this year and how you can wreak vengeance on them in 2017
@R_A_Dadass: My wife has been binge watching episodes of snapped, so I cancelled my life insurance policy, and haven't slept or eaten in days.