@craiguito: If your partner says "if anything happens to me, I want you to meet someone new," "anything" doesn't include getting stuck in a traffic jam
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@704919828: Apparently googling "how to get suspended with pay" from my work computer is frowned on by my employer.
@GrumpyBahr: Apparently not checking the mail is not a valid excuse for not paying your bills. The more you know.
@shawnspree: Banned an 80 year old man for life from attending NBA games. What's that? Like maybe 10 years?