@MoistPork: If you're a vegan and an atheist and a runner, how do you choose which way to annoy people in a conversation first?
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@trojansauce: NIETZSCHE: god is dead! he remains dead! and we have killed him! ME AS NIETZSCHE'S LAWYER: your honour we're gonna need a recess
@AKcrazy18: Running away doesn't help you with your problems. Unless you're fat.
@whosnutstoo: Your heart beats faster, your knees go weak, you start to sweat. Is this love? No you're probably hypoglycemic
@DebraMuffin: Nothing says 'I dont take you seriously' like your dog wagging his tail when you are yelling at him.
@DirtMcTurd: I just did my own taxes for the first time and I'm glad I did because I'm getting 8 million dollars back this year!
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