@1Happytwit: If you're already in the cop car, I really can't see how puking in it could make things any worse.
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@mrtruthandsoul: *holding cardboard sign by intersection* NOT POOR JUST ON MY WAY TO BREAK DANCING SCHOOL
@jordan_stratton: DID YOU KNOW: If every person on the planet lined up along the Earth's equator, most of them would drown.
@MichaelLarrick: Being illiterate and having a girlfriend would be easy. They'd be like "did you get my text?" and you could just be like "I can't read."
@sfreeze6: Eye of the tiger. Nose of the lion. Mouth of the lynx. Ear of the bobcat. Throat of the cougar. Forehead of the ocelot.