@KevinFarzad: If you're an astronaut and you don't end every relationship by saying "look, I just need space" then you're wasting everyone's time.
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@GianDoh: Freak out your neighbors by removing one member of their stick figure decal family each night.
@dlockw21: Therapist: Talk about your friends. Me: Now John at the bar is a friend of mine... T: That's a Billy Joel song. Me: You're no fun.
@ibid78: -Joe's coming over. "Joe from work or Joe who thinks he's the Norse god, Thor?" [the distant sound of thunder makes the guacamole quiver]