@KevinFarzad: If you're an astronaut and you don't end every relationship by saying "look, I just need space" then you're wasting everyone's time.
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@dafloydsta: [speed dating] Her: THIS IS NICE Me: I'M HAVING FUN TOO Her: WHAT KIND OF DRUG DID YOU SAY THIS WAS? Me: IT'S CALLED SPEED
@kellyoxford: Web MD is like a Choose Your Own Adventure book where the ending is always cancer.
@itsa_talia: when i end emails with best, talia it is not abbreviated well-wishes, but letting you know that i am the best talia.