@bellicosejason: If you're behind someone at an ATM, let them know you're not a threat by gently kissing their neck.
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@QwertyJones3: I used to hate flying. I thought the plane would go down. But now I just bring my wife with me on the plane because my wife never goes down.
@MsFoxIfUrNasty: M: If my chip:salsa ratio isn't perfectly even, I will burn down this restaurant, I swear to God. H: This is our house. M: I SWEAR TO GOD!
@shkeeber: Dude, why did you buy Grand Theft Auto 5? I mean, honestly, you live in Detroit. You could've just gone outside and saved yourself $50.