@shutupmikeginn: If you're ever bored in a taxi I recommend mouthing, "Help Me" to strangers and watching their facial expressions
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@flahertykeely: stuck on a crowded subway next to a girl playing candycrush, she made a bad move & half the car went "ooooo" in a chorus of dismay
@BrettDruck: I dated a 21 year old for 3 months before she looked up from her phone and realized I wasn't Tobey Maguire
@weismanjake: If I were a cop and pulled a woman over for speeding I would keep crying until she let me give her a ticket.
@shutupmikeginn: [Target cashier stares at my fingerless gloves] Ah, couldn't help notice you were admiring my hand vests.