@3sunzzz: If you're giving me directions and you say, "Head north," I'm going to think you mean toward the sky.
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@lawking30: She asked for my name, if I'm alone, had me remove belt/shoes & take out what I have in my pants. Interactions w/TSA agents are underrated.
@Rollinintheseat: If you don't call your spouse "wonderful" when you're on a game show, you're legally required to get a divorce at the end of the show.
@JediGigi: Mom: So, do you have someone special in your life? Me: Define "someone" Mom: You know, a boyfriend. Me: Define "boyfriend"
@LeonEarlgrey: Hey girl are you my golf clubs? Because I tottaly forgot to take you out of my trunk.