@drinksmcgee: If you're going to lie about where you're from, at least try to make it sound like a real place and not something fake like "New Zealand"
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@daemonic3: MAN: [having heart attack] HELP...CAN'T...MOVE ME: Dude, are you ok?! MAN: [faintly] CALL...ME...A...DOCTOR ME: Oh sorry! Doctor, are you ok?!
@timdonakowski: Okay, wait a second. I pee, I do my belt, THEN I wash my hands. I don't know about you but I've never, ever washed my belt.
@ibid78: "Babe there's something I've always wanted to do.." *tenderly moves her bangs away from her eyes then scotch tapes them to her forehead*