@pintubaba_: If you're happy and you know it, thank your ex.
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@sarcasm_inc: Me: I'm hot blooded check it and see got a fever of 103! 911: Did u call earlier about having a bad case of loving me? M: maybe 911: stop
@RocketRankoon: My ID expired so I can only go to the liquor store where they remember me: the one where I asked the cashier out and threw up on the floor.
@SCbchbum: The funniest part about The Bachelor is the participants actually think being married is a prize.