@FriendlyAssh0le: if you're having a bad day, remember, there are people out there who have their ex's name tattooed on themselves.
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@_Aynne_: My favorite thing to say when a man offers me a drink is, "Of course I'll have another...I AM drinking for two, after all!"
@AlexvanBeek: Lauren on Facebook asks: "What's the best way to ward off ghosts?" To which I replied: "a camera."
@shakenbakegurl: I'm really bad at measuring the correct amount of pasta, so if you and 79 of your friends want spaghetti tonight, come on over.