@DanMentos: "Hello, 911”
Hi it's Mickey my dog is hurt bad
“Is it Goofy or Pluto?”
I don’t see how-
“Goofy or Pluto?”
Pluto
“Call a vet” *hangs up*
@Ygrene: [first day at coaching job where I lied pretty badly on my resume]
ok guys, get out there & do some of those *looks at clipboard* slum danks
@iwearaonesie: me: Did you brush your teeth?
9: Yes
me *hands him a glass of orange juice*
9: Do I have to?
me: Yep. Told you not to touch my Cheetos
@jaslakhmna: While people argue about the glass being half empty or half full...I'll just be drinking from the bottle !
@bmarked21: Babies are instinctual swimmers like puppies, right? Kind of need an answer quickly.
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