@rolldiggity: If you're in a bar and a newscaster says, "Police report the killer left a small doll at the scene," don't shout, "It was an action figure!"
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@Barknado69: Friend: just make small talk *later, on date* Me: so...grains of sand Her: uh yea- Me: dwarves Her: are u okay- Me: bottle caps
@NintenDom: It's Facebook's 10th birthday today. Let's all click "Maybe" on the event invite and then not show up.
@EndhooS: My wife says brushing my teeth when sitting on the toilet is disgusting but honestly this toilet brush is almost brand new