@rolldiggity: If you're in a bar and a newscaster says, "Police report the killer left a small doll at the scene," don't shout, "It was an action figure!"
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@NervousJr: Snow White is my favorite Disney movie about a man trying to hook up with a woman who just wants to sleep.
@pinupteacher: Looking out the window, some kid on the plane asked why everything was getting smaller. Haha, what a dummy. WE'RE getting bigger. Kids, lol.
@samfromks: My wife has been helping my neighbor hook up his VCR for 3 hours now. Starting to get suspicious... What kind of monster still has a VCR?
@ItsAndyRyan: The English language lacks a word to mean "To make a spouse feel uncomfortable by aggressively cleaning the house around them".
@yaseen_moi: Hey, I lost my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?
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