@jake_lach: *Holds door for woman
*Slams door in her boyfriend's face
@ChadKroeber: Me: *tries to knock 1st kite out of tree using 2nd kite*
*gets 2nd kite stuck in tree*
Genie: please don't w-
Me: I wish for a third kite
@markydoodoo: American Horror Story: Public Restroom
@ilovepie84: Whenever I see someone with spider web tattoos on their elbows I spray them with Raid and attempt to flush them down the toilet.
@MythicPicnic: I'm at the age where I need at least 3 weeks advance notice before doing anything spontaneous
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