@lazerdoov: If you're wondering if humans are idiots we hunt ducks with guns when they will walk right up to you if you have bread
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@notorious_stars: I've decided to write a 'knock knock' joke about Jehovah's witnesses. "Knock, Knock, Knock , knock knock knock knock knock "
@Marlebean: They say a long, tight hug releases endorphins to make you feel calm and happy. I think the guy in front of me at this DMV would disagree.
@jordan_stratton: I like to intentionally barge into guys wearing camo and then look around bewildered like I have no idea what I just ran into.
@IamJackBoot: At this late date, the only way I'm gonna be famous is if I save a baby from a fire. And the baby is filming the whole thing with his phone.