@Steelers1972: If zombies ever attack just go to Costco, they have walls, years of food and supplies, and zombies can't get in without a Costco membership
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@moose_chocolate: Music star Kenny Rogers announced his retirement yesterday. In other news, Kenny Rogers is still alive, apparently.
@trentistweeting: "Go out there, kid! Make a name for yourself-" JAMARCUS McTHUNDERNUGGETS THE THIRD "Trent that's not really what i-" It's Jamarcus now
@david8hughes: Therapist: today we're going to do an exercise Me [shifts nervously in seat]: oh, I-uh Therapist: calm down, fatty. Not actual exercise