@thepunningman: Ikea said if they catch me stealing any more kitchen utensils I'll be banned for life. But I'm willing to take the whisk.
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@Tbone7219: The cops just showed up at work & all the workers that have been in trouble before fled. At least that's what I can see from under my desk.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Watch closely as the husband quietly approaches the calm children, riles them up into a frenzy, then slyly escapes to watch football.
@Try2StopME: Most people in horror movies would still be alive, if only those idiots had listened to the audience.