@KayRants: I'll apologize for last night right after you tell me which parts you still remember.
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@Nikkeya08: Children change a lot of things like now if I get lost in a corn maze I just lay down and take a nap or run toward the guy with a chainsaw.
@DanielEdison_: I wish I could stop naming Bruce Willis films. I guess old habits... Pulp Fiction.
@T_N_Crumpets: Wife: Are you crying in there? Me crying: NO! W: have you been eating cheese again? *opens door* Me with mousetrap stuck to lips: NO
@Schmoodles: I finally decided to unfollow someone who hasn't tweeted in a year. They'll probably come back tomorrow & make me look like a real c**t.