@KayRants: I'll apologize for last night right after you tell me which parts you still remember.
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@dafloydsta: INTERVIEWER: On average, how often do you miss work? ME: *sweating profusely* NO ONE SAID THERE'D BE MATH
@gruffybeard: Yes kids, Daddy does have a favorite and you'll find out which one of you it is when my will is read.
@lawyerthoughts: *throws phone over courthouse metal detector. catches phone on the other side. resumes conversation*