@Sassafrantz: I'll do your taxes for free if you tell my mom we're dating.
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@jimmytorosian: Avril Lavigne: He was a boy. She was a girl. Can I make it any more obvious? Me: Yes you could. That is incredibly vague.
@truegritrumble: (First Day as an Interior Decorator) ME: I'm not sure this giant cross is right for this space. PRIEST: Again, this is a church.
@Brianhopecomedy: My 5 year old is looking all over the house for his drumsticks but he won't have any luck finding them without a shovel.
@nice_mustard: what if you thought you had met your soul mate but then you saw them put mayonnaise on a hotdog