@BackrowSeats: I'll sleep when I'm dead. I'll sleep tonight as well. There's also a pretty good chance I'll take a nap soon.
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@bjnovak: The Razzi family had more family photographs than any other family. All thanks to the dad. Papa Razzi. Goodnight everyone
@rpbateman: This coworker is in a really good mood this morning, so I hacked his Facebook account and wrote "sexy" on all of his wife's friends' pics.
@chrisdelia: Me: *Asks question on snapchat* Them: *Answers question on snapchat* Me: "Wait, what did I ask again?"
@rose24_em: 21st century divorce: I want it stipulated that he can't change the Netflix password.