@Midgetspar: I'm 100% sure Zebra's didn't earn those things.
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@robdelaney: My uncle was found dead in his office last night by cleaning staff. I'm glad because he wore Crocs to my wedding in 2006.
@MikeZakarian: Anxiety = waiting to see if the middle seat will stay unoccupied as people are boarding your flight.
@Donnie_Fairburn: One time someone told me the camera adds 10 pounds and I was like why would anyone eat a camera you idiot?