@thestlouisan: I'm 39 and I still don't know where to look when the dentist is working on my teeth.
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@Thedudish: That awkward moment when your girlfriend is looking up for a noodles recipe on your computer and opens a file called "Asian."
@JB4Realz: SON: Daddy, where do tweets come from? DAD: Well, son...when a Desire for Validation and a Character Limit love each other very, very much.
@mommywhitfield: Apparently, "I understand why some animals eat their young," is not a socially acceptable answer when someone asks you how you're doing. Whatever.
@beccafacexo: If I ever get kidnapped, my plan is to just talk non-stop about Lost until they see that I'm very annoying, and they return me to safety.