@Phook75: I'm 89% certain I'm technically still dating at least 3 women from the late 90's early 2000's cause I left for beer and never came back
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@hipstermermaid: I just want a time machine so I can show up at the Salem witch trials with an iPad.
@Mr_Kapowski: [gently brushes your hair out of your face] "You're gonna be so pissed when you wake up and see your haircut," I whisper
@weinerdog4life: Blind Date Tip: In the middle of dinner throw a surprise punch to see if they are really blind