@Gooooats: "I'm a feminist," he said wanttogetintoyourpantsingly.
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@TheReal_AndyMac: Money can't buy you happiness. But it can buy you burritos and a Slip N' Slide. So you do the math.
@kelkulus: evanescence - noun: the process of vanishing or fading out of sight, memory, or existence. So that's what happened. Great band name, guys.
@jessokfine: [Sexting] "So, what are you wearing?" A nice blouse and a light sweater. Sensible shoes.
@TheNaique: Every time a magician graduates from his school and throws his hat in the air at the convocation, PETA sues him for cruelty to rabbits.