@MyPornKhan: I'm a married white male; my forefathers saw to it that I'm not allowed to be offended by anything.
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@Blarebare: The pet groomer didn't appreciate the 10 dollar bill I slid across the table to give my dog the "happy ending".
@WPLGLocal10: Man arrested after accidentally texting probation officer asking if he had any weed
@mynameisntdave: ME: how long will it take to remodel my house? CONTRACTOR: only about 2 months [9 years later] CONTRACTOR: ok so we've installed 1 stair