@meganamram: I'm a real gym rat (i go there at night and eat their garbage)
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@mattZillaaaa: I just sent a screen shot of my drunken tweets to my friends & they are still asking if I can come pick them up
@brynnester: My wife likes to make love with Barry Manilow in the background. It's as awkward for him as it is for me
@ComedicBust: My girlfriend's furious that I bought her The Golden Girls box set for her birthday, but I knew she'd get over it since she's not real.
@Tw1tter_K1tten: One thing I've learned about this world is that there are always going to be people who want to change you. -babies