@Sassafrantz: I'm always a big fan of the prison teardrop tattoo. It says I'm sensitive but I've killed people.
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@scott2ten: Co-worker: Face up or face down? Me: Um. What? Cw: The fax machine? Documents face up or down? Me: I'm not mature enough to answer that.
@lovemydogduck: During the day I don't believe in ghosts, But at night I'm a little bit more open minded
@aveuaskew: If you speak like Fat Albert throughout the entire exam, doctors will prescribe whatever you want.
@juanadog: Saw a sign on the highway that said "Kill or Injure a Road Worker: $7,500" but it doesn't tell me where to pick up the money...